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Thursday, June 28, 2012

Surgery Update

Well, we are thus far almost 5.5 hours into surgery.  Well, not into surgery but since we arrived at least.

We got in at 6:15 this morning.  It was a tough, tough  night.  I literally laid with Logan on our bed and smelled his hair for a good half hour just so that I wouldn't forget what he smelled like.  There were lots of tears, lots of snuggles, lots of hugs and pep talks.

By far the hardest thing so far was saying good bye.  They took us back to our pre op room and a bunch of nurses came in and out to get him ready.  Check his vitals, change him into a gown, get his bracelet on.  And my little rock star was just happy as can be, giving smiles out to everyone that came in.  I would pick him up and he'd start smacking away for food, but never got mad that I wouldn't feed him.  He would lie there all cute and cuddly looking up at me with these big innocent eyes and just smile.  It was a "Don't worry Mom, trust me" kind of smile.  You can lock eyes with him and feel safe and torn in two all at the same time.  My heart literally ached for him.  Sheer terror sets in.  It's not healthy to think that this is the last time you might see him, but I'm here to tell you that it goes through your head.  Big time.  You want one last kiss, one last snuggle, one last smile.

It really is the toughest thing I have ever done in my life.

Since then though we've been doing really well.  They took Logan back around 7:30 and have been updating us throughout the morning.  So far so good.  He is currently on the bypass machine and has one hole fixed. An hour ago they were starting the repair on the second and larger hole.  Once those are complete they'll check to make sure everything looks OK, take him off of bypass and stitch him back up.  We think we should be able to see him again in the next few hours.  

We are by no means out of the woods yet, but it's a relief to know that things are going as planned.  No surprises, nothing unscheduled.  That's the way you want it at the hospital.  Boring is good.  

I'll try to update later tonight with a full run down on how he is doing.  Many thanks to everyone for the hugs and prayers!  We absolutely could not do this without the support of our family, friends and entire community. 
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